Behind every strong black man I usually see about 3 or 4 really tired cops.

Current status: cleanin my bathroom listening to Otis Redding.. *cough cough* i mean..ummm.. Smackin all kinds a bitches

I was totally glued to the tv this morning watching the royal wedding. Just kidding I'm black.

If you white and you on the same bus as me, then you fucked up in life somewhere

Next one of you bitches that critiques my grammar is gettin blocked. I didnt spend 6 years at air conditionin school for this bullshit!

If I went to a Jimmy Buffet concert all the white people would think I'm Hootie

let's be honest white people.

i dont know what the fuck that nigga Al Sharpton do for a livin neither.

Pro-tip fellas: These pretty bitches dont cook and clean.

So we're all agreed that burlesque is just another name for chunky stripper right?

Lawd Baby Jesus. we come to you today to ask forgiveness fo our sins cause we know this old bitch drivin this bus aint took her medication

does this piece of fried chicken in my mouth make me look black?

Note to good clean white folk: quit lookin so paraniod when youre sittin in your car waiting for your dealer. welcome.

Sooo.. Its a lotta white folk and a whole lotta womenfolk at this gun range. Im afraid...so very afraid

I love the dollar store. Im always ballin outta control in dat bitch!

my next gf wont know i have a twitter. this i promise

my "I Have a Dream" speech has the words 'mexican' and 'babymomma' and 'child support' in it... Dont fucking ask!

Fuckin a lotta dudes and tellin erybody doesnt make you a lady. Now fuckin a lotta dudes and keepin your mouth shut makes you a lady

I like my white women like my crime rate - HIGH

I hate when I rob a bank & forget to get a lollipop.

just put my clothes in the dryer with no Downy dryer fabric softener sheets! Why you ask??? Because I'm a gangsta, THAT'S WHY!