Distance is such a bitch.

I'm the type of person driving on the interstate who thinks of slow vehicles as obstacles & fast ones as opponents. Cops add more strategy.

I really like that I follow a bunch of weirdos.

I was going to recommend the music game app #Romplr because it's fun, but instead I'll recommend it because I found @unwoman music on it.

There's nothing like a kiss long and hot down to your soul that almost paralyzes you...

#JamesJoyce
#Ulysses

Kettle corn. If you don't like it, I expect you are lying to yourself for some awkward reason. Just keep munching & hiding your affections.

Ran two miles in 21 minutes. If I pick up the starting pace, I could run a 5k in less than 30 minutes.

Not bragging, just proud of myself.

When @unwoman and @emilieautumn make an album together, the world will shatter and suddenly there will be order in the chaos. And happiness.

“@ashleystrauss: VoldeFord, the official vehicle of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.” ... Really, I would've been expecting a Voldswagen.

Beware naming a daughter "River." She's likely to become such a badass that you won't be able to handle her. #Firefly #Serenity #DoctorWho

The first day of the rest of my life is looking oddly familiar to every other damn day...

Rick Perry is out. One less idiot to potentially ruin the country. Texas needs to start placing smarter people in these higher positions.

“@ThePresObama: Even if you added more Cowbell you couldn't improve the the GOP.” :D <3

I have a knack for perceiving things. I can see how it sounds. I can feel how it sings.

Ran a couple miles. I feel like my body is taking revenge on me for having food from the Cheesecake Factory.

But I probably deserve it. :-P

My favorite Pokemon are Arcanine and Nidoking. Apparently I need to travel to Japan and wander around areas of tall grass to catch one.

Oh, you can be a douche to everyone because you've got "swag?" Let's see how well you do when I stab you in the face with a soldering iron.

If there were a virus that killed all of the intelligent life in the universe, I assume humanity would survive.

Take a shot. Don't think about it too much. Just take a shot. Anywhere. Everywhere. Just take wild shots. Just to hear the gun go off.

I hope one of the next Bourne films features an assassin killing everyone on Earth with direct close quarters combat...

I'm not sure why.