The death of a young person is tragic whether it's in Oslo, Somalia or London. There's no ranking system.

RT @Tarek_Hamade: If Ryan Giggs wife walks out on him & takes 50% of everything,she'll have 6 more Premier League medals than Steven Gerrard

#twitterblackout is trending. Surely the most epic of Twitter fails.

I know a Spanish guy who works backstage at burlesque shows untangling corsets. He's a basque separatist.

Martine McCutcheon's bowels must be like the Log Flume at Alton Towers by now. #Activia

Apparently one member of Blue gets really scared watching The Wizard Of Oz. I reckon it's the coward Lee Ryan.

We shouldn't forget The Sun (Hillsborough lies), The Mirror (fake torture photos) & The Star (fake anti-Muslim stories) are also atrocious.

For LFC fans and others: Kelvin McKenzie has joined the Daily Mail. Please #dontbuythemail #dontbuythesun and remember this is about #JFT96

Fernando Torres has now gone 34 matches without a smile.

#northernfilms T'erminator

#alicebucketlist #alicebucketlist #alicebucketlist #alicebucketlist #alicebucketlist #alicebucketlist #alicebucketlist

Moobs like Jabba.

Conrad Murray had botox before the MJ trial. Smooth criminal.

Unlucky Chelsea. Howard Webb is fully fit and in the United team for the title decider.

I see Croyden is trending. Is that near Croydon?

Messi is fantastic but by 24 Pele had scored 398 goals (including a goal a game record for Brazil), won 2 World Cups and scored in the final

Apparently there is a new law governing the use of full stops. If you break it, you could potentially get a very long sentence.

#periodictablefilms Monster Zinc

#xfactor Tulisa doesn't know Aretha Franklin. I am still absorbing this. She's getting big money to 'judge' this entertainment show.

#youshouldbeembarrassed that #embarrasingbodies is trending, and spelt incorrectly.