Protesters calling for people with battery to film police beating unarmed protesters in Trafalgar Square. Please RT. #March26

So after all that talk of Muslim terrorists and Bin Laden, it turns out those who would do the most damage to our country were London chavs.

I can tell it's Christmas day because a gift bag is shuffling along the carpet and I can't find my cat.

The Americans are celebrating Osama's death and doing exactly what we see Muslim extremists do, dancing about with flags. Pot. Kettle. Black

I'm looking to recruit two writers for an online lads mag who are witty & satirical. I've left it too late, need something in 24 hrs. Pls RT

Any ladies out tonight, if some sleazeball asks u to put ur no. in his phone, take it, text ACT to 70300 to donate to Women's Aid instead :)

Change your birthday to tomorrow's date on FB and see how many people wish you happy birthday. Then delete them. These are not your friends.

Seven children die each day from unruly orchestras. Change your avatar to an instrument today and end violins against children. Please RT.

@reedtimmerTVN This video shows Dallas tornado picking up trucks http://t.co/CIpQM3fM via @AhmNoHere

Hey, public sector workers of the North East, this is what your local politician thinks of you. http://t.co/OqNst08

Saying social media needs regulation after riots is like saying we should regulate cash machines after the recession.Its a tool not a reason

Have you seen this? Slightly unfortunate. http://twitpic.com/4lqdu0

Wouldn't it be nice if UK's number one was a song about how the NHS is not for sale? Currently at 59. But 79p is nowt http://bit.ly/hnGeSt

How come the unilad pro-rape Facebook comments aren't being brought to trial? Comments that ACTUALLY WERE menacing? #twitterjoketrial

I don't know why people are so dismissive about Twitter. "But you don't know these people." You can enjoy a book without meeting the author.

The conservative candidate for my ward got bitten by a dog today. Haha. I love dogs.

The sad truth about Star Wars. http://t.co/OiXi9SNH

Duncan Bannatyne is defending the UK's actions in Libya at the moment. Twitter campaign to send him there? Fire up the online petitions.

Awkward. http://twitpic.com/5ti5p1

Nobody is going to look at a cartoon avatar and go, "Oh that reminds me of when I was a child. I'd best stop hitting kids then."