@donni

donni

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Favs Rec'd	574,531
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Following	831
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Comedy sandwich. Writer, riffer, fledgling opener, openly miked. Host of TwitTalkers (http://twittalkers.com). Only wrestles sea cows seasonally.

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@donni recent tweets

Who are these Mothers Against Double Ds? What is their problem?

@donni

Hey, people who don't believe in crystals: They exist! I've seen 'em.

@donni

69 Favs

60Others

5 RTs

Retweet Details

It's totally legal to taunt a tree.

@donni

Transferred to the School Of Soft Knocks my sophomore year. It was way easier. Less bruises.

@donni

Our house, in the middle of the street, was hit by cars on a daily basis.

@donni

If a tree flows in the forest but there's no one there to hear it, is that tree a dope MC?

@donni

I'm just a regular guy. I throw my pants in one lake at a time.

@donni

I want a drug that makes me feel like I'm a drug taking myself.

@donni

Don't trust anyone over 230.

@donni

I'll go toe-to-toe with anyone. My toes are ninjas.

@donni

73 Favs

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6 RTs

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Resigning from my fantasy job to spend more time with my imaginary family.

@donni

Slime keeps on slippin', slippin', slippin' into the sewer...

@donni

There's "no case too big," Rescue Rangers? You're tiny chipmunks. You didn't even solve the Case Of How To Wear Pants.

@donni

There must be a few vegetarians who just enjoy murdering vegetables.

@donni

Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, but the CIA is controlling your thoughts with glucose!

@donni

The waffle is a pancake that's been ribbed for her pleasure.

@donni

It has come to my attention that boobs.

@donni

@fart all my life i've been very reblogged. Spit when I blog. Clothes ripped like the Incredible Blog.

@donni in reply to fart

7 Favs

Just walked in on my toaster masturbating with a slice of whole wheat.

@donni

You guys ever eat food? That shit is crazy!

@donni

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